Are you in a relationship with a narcissist? If so, you might have experienced the phenomenon known as “love bombing,” which is yet another form of …
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The Soulmate Scammer: How to Identify a Love Bombing Narcissist
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Very true all along! I've been doing a good read about this for quite some time now since it's a very interesting topic and that one must be aware of such types. Yes I have personally met a few people like this in all walks of life and it's true. The extent to which they can go is ridiculous. Thankfully am saved and arrived at a much wanted conclusion from a few friends and family. This video is brilliant. Thumbs up!!!
Love your work but most of this is one sided as a man who's gone through this I have all clarity as to how men act but nothing on how a woman does it
good job on the resource portion of this video! I really like your style!
Lovebombing also doesn't have to be romantic. I had a gay male friend do this to me, (though he never told me he was gay and I learned about it 7 yrs later on Twitter). His lovebombing consisted of admiring my work (I am a writer), agreeing with all my opinions on art, literature, etc. telling me how much I have influenced him, how special and important I am in his life, etc. Though he lied to me about his name for the 1st 3 yrs I knew him and could be the most cruel and coldest person I've ever encountered. This was during the devaluation and our 'friendship' followed the same trajectory as a romantic relationship–idealization, devaluation (gaslighting, emotional abuse, pathological lying) and throwing me crumbs. He was a covert narc w psychopathic tendencies.
Hey Angie, what if the He is a She?
Escaped early , thanks for the info. No contact initiated and being maintained despite the temptation to pity the person
I would love to let people see my wattsapp text log from my ex, especially the three weeks before we met up after matching on a dating app, she contacted me first and wanted to exchange numbers straight away… she was crazy about me, never met in person either, I went along with this behaviour and really enjoyed it, only for the fact I went away on holiday I'd have met up with her sooner, she wanted to hide in my suitcase to come with me! (jokingly) if I'd not been groomed to such a degree maybe I'd have had second thoughts after meeting up, we had talked for hours and hours, we seemed so compatible, or so I had thought…
They begin testing you within two weeks or so to see how strongly you're attached. This creates a foundation for their future exploits. Also, simply asking if they have a jealous streak can be a huge flag. Jealousy is a sign that something is wrong.
accurate description of my soon to be ex :)
you are in my top 3 faves on this subject Angie 🙂
thank you!
i was in a relationship for 13 years with an overt narc. next came the covert cerebral narc who had the opposite personality of the overt. spent 14 years with the covert. i never heard of NPD until recently. the covert was quiet, kind, humble, gentle in the beginning. i felt high (dopamine?) with the love bombing. never felt high like that before in the beginning of a relationship. the narc played the poor victim. he just wanted a nice woman to love. he cried when he said that. i loved this man more than any other person i have ever met. it took a long time for him to slowly drip his emotional abuse poison on me. he really messed my mind up with his underhanded passive aggressive abuse. i have ptsd and anxiety and depression and crying. nasty narcs! i now know the red flags. he did have red flags in the beginning. in the end, he did the sweet and mean cycle alot. confusion. so, our relationship lasted a long time. he and i did communicate very well together. i miss talking to him. he still is my favorite person to talk to. in the end he got so insane i was able to google the symptoms for narcissism. i do no contact. it is hard to love someone so much and in the end, the abuse was wicked. i have seen him a few times after he discarded me. he is very shaky, nervous, and cries tears. he had a stroke right after the discard. i believe i have seen his true self. i have a feeling he really did love me. his sickness makes it so he is not able to truly find love. i think he realizes that he has a false self. he is stuck in his narcissism. i was good to him. i think he realizes there was no reason to abuse a nice woman like myself. this narc knows something is wrong with him. i told him he as a narcissist and to get help. he didn't know he was one. of course, he doesn't believe me. he won't get help. i told him narcissism comes from being an abused child and he cried. strange feeling. knowing he tried to love and can't. i feel sad for him and myself. i can move on. he can't. this got long. sorry. it has only been 4 months since the discard. i love him and dislike him at the same time. narcs put you in insanity land.
my ex only claimed one of his exs was crazy. he tried to claim that the one before me was a 3 yr relationship and they never fought. he just didn't love her. she left behind in the apartment he rented to her a book called men who can't love. he tried to make me think that our fighting once every 6 weeks was not normal and it was me who startd it. him and Susan never fought. I told him in my last correspondence to him, bullshit and you were the one who put the wheels in motion every time the roller coaster ride started. I kept notes, so I know. I called him a narcissistic psychopath. I never heard from him again. Sometimes the pretend their other relationships were fine and it's just this one because well we just dont get along. even though we got along great 90% of the time. I said he was nuts. thanks for all you do. :)
My narc never used the term "soulmate" but he preferred to say "co-conspirators" but it was the same idea. He's absolutely obsessed with meeting a woman who will "get" him. It's all he talked about. But he is in an online LDR with his soulmate now. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Excellent video. Two women love-bombed me, and the description is spot-on. And I only happened on this site because I was researching a topic related to workplace abuse. In this case, the woman was extremely eager to obtain sexual gratification, as well as some material gratification. I have broken up with that person once before, and she traveled – on her own dime – from Denmark to Germany to meet up with me and reconcile. An interesting aspect is gift-giving. Impoverished (through her own fault), she would look longingly at shop windows, and I would often satisfy certain material desires. A few of them were genuine; boots and coats that match the weather rather than fashion, but quite a few other things that I have given away or bought, which, strangely enough, I can't seem to spot in her apartment…
All very good. But keep it gender neutral. Women are narcissists too!
I'm being love bombed right now after meeting a guy (I've met him 3 times at a salsa place) and since this is the 11th or 12th narcissist in my life (most of the encounters are short lived but here's yet another one), it doesn't feel good at all. When he kissed me I sometimes felt a rush of butterflies in my stomach but at the same time I know he has been working to isolate me and underneath those butterflies, I feel sick to my stomach. I just feel like I'm getting caught in a sticky web and the glue is oozing all over me and I'm being numbed and my movements are slow because of the all too familiar spell that has been cast on me. But I'm too aware of narcissists and his tactics are too cookie cutter and I need to get out before it turns into anything. I have recently been doing inner work and self healing of my inner child and I DONT want to give up that progress for anyone no matter how amazing he seems (which is an illusion anyway).
One I met sure wasted no time in moving mighty fast, and actually thought I was going to get rid of my pets I adore and up and leave the state and go move in with him clear across to the other side of the United States. First of all, I have never moved into any man's home and never would, and who the heck did he think he was to demand I get rid of my pets? Never! He also sure had big eyeballs on my motorcycle and was making his plans to pull that too, I was really, LOL. I have been a Top Rated Seller on eBay for years, and he wanted for me to sell his junk. When I asked him about opening his own account, he said was suspended because owed a lot of money. I then told him then no I wasn't doing it, because my reputation as seller was important to me and I wouldn't have it jeopardized. Then if that wasn't enough, (this fool had no shame-which they don't) he actually thought he could con me by giving the sad story that he desperately needed a $300.00 pair of gloves for work, because these people he did a job for took off and didn't pay him his money, and if I would buy them and he would pay me later. Nope, I absolutely wouldn't do that, but when he did get the money he could send the money to my PayPal account, and then I'd buy the gloves and have the seller ship them to his address, and there was no conning PayPal or eBay, for I have been with them for years. The biggest neon flag was when I asked him about previous relationships, and he about took my head off. He would constantly call my home phone from 7:00am to 11:00pm, and I would tell the latest he could call was 8:30pm, He just would not respect this boundary, and I had to put the do not disturb setting on the phone which he was annoying him and he was letting it made known to me through email. He was doing all this in a span of seven days, and I already knew he was bad news, changed my number and ghosted him. He had my gmail, and with gmail you can't block people. So of course he wasted no time in sending a bunch of nasty hate messages, and I had to set up a canned response so they'd go straight to the trash can. I haven't dated in six years, and omg that fool and yet still one other I met and went to dinner with in February who resulted in being a sociopath. I made a decision to continue to decline invitations to dinner or any socializing with men ever again.
There are many male victims of abusive and manipulative women. Why do you make this so one way? Wouldn't it be better to use neutral terms and colors? I've been love bombed by women. There is no indication in your title that this was going to be so gender biassed.
I love love love your videos! high fives -athena :)
No matter HOW many times I went through this with narcs, , in the past, I fell for the love bombing EVERY FREAKIN TIME. One of the common love bombing things is the narc "becomes" , spiritually (and seemingly coincidentally) wherever/whatever you are, spiritually, speaking. I have had them pretend to love rescuing dogs, (like I do) JUST to suck me in. Mine all knew their bibles very well, but certainly did not live by it. One used his pilot's license and plane ( I was afraid to fly, but he WON MY TRUST and "made me feel safe") to get me up in the air, and thrilled to be taking the controls. The ADRENALINE rush made me think he was WAY more awesome than he was. I suspect that they also played up my sexual prowess with RAVE REVIEWS of "how sexy and hot I was in bed." Basically, if it SEEMS too good to be true? If you have that IMMEDIATE "CHEMISTRY?" RUN! RUN AWAY FAST! DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT $200! Seriously…it's just your codependency or empathy being magnetically pulled in by their big empty black holes of need. RUN.
OMG! U described my ex- husbands, the 1st and the 3rd one
! I wish I had this info back when I was 17!
No offense, but it sounds sexist. Are you telling me that only men can be NPD? I think a he/she is viable…
Wow. This is exactly what I'm going through AND engaged to him! I'm trying to figure out how to get out of it. I hate that I keep getting dooped by these types of men. How do I not get drawn into this?
Thank you so much for your videos!
It's exactly what he said, it is so spooky. "You're my soulmate". "I've never felt this before". "My ex never told me I was handsome or made me feel special". After I found out about the years of deceit and lies, he was telling his online ladies that I was mentally unwell. :)
Your welcome and thank you for your comment you made about my videos ….it means alot to me.
i didn't get the love bomb, i got the "rescue me" let me move in my roomates are greedy and i cant afford to stay where i am. when he came back from his ex he made no apology for how he left me the first time.
In this video, you hit the nail right on the head.