Narcissism is categorized as a personality disorder by the mental health profession (Narcissistic Personality Disorder – NPD). Of course there are very few individuals who are formally diagnosed with NPD, mostly because few, if any, actually seek out therapy.
Dealing with a narcissist during a marriage can be a challenging endeavor; however dealing with a narcissist during a divorce can be almost impossible. The narcissist will often look to manipulate others, especially partners, ultimately to control them. Projection and blame are often key elements to their manipulation.
When a partner finds the courage to divorce a narcissist , the sense of control loss can lead them to become verbally abusive and sometimes even physical. They will often become enraged when faced with a partner who has found self power. The narcissist feels the need to punish their partner for their sense of control loss and will feel justified in their actions. This can lead to an escalation of their methods of control and abuse. The lies will be bolder and he or she will try to manipulate with more intensity. There is a severe need to regain power and control and they will go to any means in their quest. It is not uncommon for the narcissist to deplete all assets to pay attorneys to continue the battle.
Often an abused spouse will give into requests or negotiations, in hopes that the narcissist will be satisfied and they can possible move forward in the divorce proceedings. However, the typical narcissist will just move onto the next item or issue which they feel will add to the punishment.
When dealing with a narcissist , don’t expect empathy, they are physically not capable. Don’t base your own self esteem on what is said or the opinions expressed by your partner. Don’t take on all the blame yourself, the narcissist projects blame onto others. Remember that a narcissist is really an emotionally scarred individual unable to let others in or admit they have any faults.
Source by
Mark Pfenning
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