Narcissist can’t stand your happiness response to youtuber Skaismith http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmGONf6cc64 http://menwhoareabused.com.
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Narcissist can’t stand your happiness response to youtuber Skaismith
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Amen I had to leave my mother as a teenager over and over till I had kids of my own whom she is completely neglectful towards
Jealousy and competitiveness are also narcissistic traits. I know one whom couldn't accept it when someone (male of female) liked me, and liked me more than her. She would put me down all the time to build herself up. I finally realized she was just jealous, and competing with me. Narcissts have to be the center of attention all the time. If you don't give them that, or take it away from them, they think of you as a threat.
you have to use automated voice for this? boring
It seems I attract narcs
NPD/BPD etc guy here. It's so true.. and I actually hate hating other people's happiness …
This is depressing stuff but really informative. I like that it does not just forgive the pain inflicted by people like me who have my issues… as they say the abused becomes the abuser.
I got destroyed by a man who hacked my line invaded my home he went as far as ruining my work my relationships he inilated me he ruined my work and made sure my jobs would be ruined then he would send texts knowing my situation asking how things are financially he ruined me he even destroyed and damaged my posessions this still goes on I just can't understand what he wants fro me luckily he lives in London not where I do
my mother was so abusive-she once wrote a personal letter to me in which she made up horrible lies like i tied her to a chair-i tormented her from my crib-etc-and had my stepfather read it and mail it registered mail for me to sign for it-this gave believability to her story to him- she abused me all my life.now im married to a narcissist-like a pattern.
That's true about happy moments. Narcissist are vampires and haters
love you lil animated fellah. when i can articulate my story properly i am going to tell it. i will use the animation program you are using. i don't want the hounds of narcissism on my heals…i have escaped!
I remember that elementary school graduation. I was three yrs and four months older than my golden child sister and I had to wear her dress so she boasted in pride about it. I was told they couldn't afford a white dress and it fit as I was severely underweight. Even at school parties, I was told I couldn't go because they couldn't afford it. The one time I remember going, a classmate came to my home to walk with me. She was told by NM, "Meena isn't ready yet so go ahead." I was on the foot of the stairs, ready to leave but I was ordered back up the stairs and to remove my clothing and put them away. NM had a problem with the white frilly blouse and the jumpsuit which was the style in the early nineties. She made me wear a tennis player's uniform instead because that made her happy. I remember how awkward and inappropriate my attire was.
Dr George Simon " In Sheeps Clothing " The Best Book You Will Ever Read. It is an Instruction Manual on how to deal with these people.
I knew a bipolar narc briefly in college. She attempted to play me for a fool and I fell for it for a time, I actually started to look up to her. When I realised something was off, I began to say less and less about myself and my opinions. Once she realised what I was doing she began to become paranoid and manic and started accusing me and her other friend of ridiculous things like stealing. I never spoke to her again after that episode and came out of it relatively unharmed. The worst she could do was bad mouth me to some acquaintances. I feel sorry for the other people in her life, one is a drug addict who relies on her for pharmaceutical drugs she gets to deal with her bipolar Nd the other is a rich man who has tried to escape in the past. Both are aware of how horrible she is and yet for some stupid reason they stick around. It is as though she is the sun and the people in her life are the planets. I have always been careful about who I allow into my sphere of influence but this woman deeply disturbs me. I don't know how others can abide her in their lives. It's like some sick codependency or something
I was in and out of therapy for 25 years before a therapist even thought to tell me
that my mother had a personality disorder.
Escape, Just Damage limitation. The sooner you leave. the less damage will occur.
If you've ever had to compete with another minion for your narcs affection, you might understand how they are both the same
Also, I feel sorry for anyone being abused and hope they figure it out in a way that is honest and not just vilifying one side of that duo. It really does take two for this disgusting game.
I recently dated a guy who showed all the signs of a narc… Good thing he's a broke shrimp and not very good looking. I used to be one who attracted narcs. Then I dated this one. I noticed that when he tried to put me down it was futile because it was brutally obvious that I was better than him in every superficial area. I didn't like it but I can see how a child in a similar dynamic shift might choose one over the other and adopt it as a main personality style. I watched the dynamic flip, all of a sudden he became my minion and I realized I had the same qualities of both the narc and the minion in me all along. I believe that insight is really helping me to leave that game forever. I swear I became a narc for like 2 months. Just observing myself in that light was really enlightening. I believe that a narc and its minion are the same just with different pathetic strategies.
If you attract narcs you are also on the same coin. Martyrs are the same, equally transparent and crippled people who disguise their sickness by acting like the opposite of a narc so they can get sympathy points the same way the narcissist strives for admiration points.
Dont think for a second that they Dont understand how you feel. They do. If they do or say something so mean that it must mean the "poor person" doesn't understand, its likely that they just got tired mentally and forgot to pretend to care. Or they are devaluing you manipulative but if they are love bombing you and say something cold, its not that they can't tell that it hurt you, it's that they are tired of their toy (you) and need to take a mental break. Its hard work to be in control of someone else's emotions. So they actually think they are Machiavelli masters for taking you over, and torturing you. This also means that you are weak in their eyes.
Narcissists do have empathy, but its not used the way most use it. Most use it as a tool to know how others feel so we can keep a harmonious give/receive balance in a relationship, or to know to give special care to someone when we know they are feeling badly, and so on. Narcs instead use it as a meter to read what makes you tick, and what makes you happy so they can manipulate and control you. They are always either squashing what makes you happy or amplifying what makes you unhappy, building you up or tearing you down, probing or just too tired to care. That's all there is too them. But make no mistake, they always are aware how you feel unless drunk on compliments or sleeping. So they do have empathy.
Downplay your happiness. Great advice. Before I became aware of this tactic I would put myself down before they got the chance. Cept I did this with everyone. Downplaying has been a great way to still celebrate and keep things in perspective for myself. Which is ok ;)
We do need more voices. Thank you.
So where is the link to Kathy that you speak about ?