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41 thoughts on “Narcissist: No Custody, No Children!

  1. I just lost a custody battle with my husband. He's never been diagnosed but I'm absolutely positive he is either a narcissistic, sociopath or psychopath. the anti-social personality is strong along with all the other traits. she's a 3 year old little girl and begs not to go back. how do I expose him? I'll do anything.

  2. I've been overwhelmed with the idea of going back to court. My ex somehow managed to use the courts against us every time. He still has custody of my son even though I have custody of my daughter. He doesn't pay child support and I can't afford legal help. My son wants to come home and is angry with me for not going back to court yet.

  3. Hi there , I live in Peru and I have been watching your videos and are very usefull how can I find your book coming out of a toxic relationship. and I am trying to learn about sociopathic narcissists people, My still husband has a serious problema, I have a child with this person and I need to learn how to handdle it.

  4. My ex-husband turned my kids against me and they chose him as their custodial parent. He still keeps them in poverty style conditions, and doesn't supervise them–my 16 year old daughter is practically living with her boyfriend and his very toxic parents. There is so much more despair going on in this, but they still blame me and don't want to have a relationship with me.
    It used to kill me, but I've learned to let go. I can't make them see the truth and I've stopped trying.

  5. Always be aware and truly to one's intention of relationship.

  6. I totally agree. The problem is he hasn't been evaluated therefore I couldn't prove anything…. Who ever has the bigger wallet for the best lawyers get it their way. No regards to the child.

  7. I agree if it's both parents and the grandparents too

  8. it pisses me off how accurate this is. my NPD grandmother had custody of me for 2 decades. so, yeah

  9. im trapped, ik my mother is a one . nd i fear i have a codepency. its a cycle and i don't want to continue. but i jus can't stop. i have a son now nd now I fear she is trying to get to my son. she makes me feel guilt. for keeping him away.

  10. you're soo right! I've been the son of a narcissistic father, a "chosen child", and have endured physical and emotional abuse although I have to say that the emotional abuse and gaslighting have affected me way greater than the physical abuse. Even when my mother moved out and took me and my brother with her, we regularly visited our father. This later proved to have the greatest impact on our lives. I was ostracized from my mother and my father of course did not give me any love but rather conditioned me to fulfill his narcissistic supply. After the first "heavy" physical abuse, I started having night mares and bedwetting again. However this quickly subsided and an emotional numbness set in from which I have recently recovered and figured out that I actually had sensations/feelings in my body accompanied by my emotions at the age of twenty-three. With the newfound feelings came back all my memories including very early ones from the early age in kindergarden. I have completely cut contact with my narcissistic father, however he thinks its "temporary" but I'll never give in or confront him with the reality as this would get quite dangerous IMO. I only encourage people to look into FasterEFT as a healing methodology. This helped me recover my memory and self esteem tremendously and get off stimulant drugs which I have started to abuse heavily in the last year. What has changed is my self-esteem and the belief that I indeed have control over my mind. I am no longer co-dependent either. I tended to draw narcissistic attention to me very easily without even realizing that I'm being ripped apart before it's too late. That said, peace! Very nice content, Sam! Glad to have somebody speak up.

  11. So true; all of it.  As narcissism becomes the norm, child abuse proliferates.  If people respected themselves and based their lives on honor and morality, society would make a come-back; but I, personally, don't see any effort in that direction.  The  Bible states that people's hearts will grow cold; narcissism. 

  12. Ive come to see this in full with my Dad when I was about 14 years old. Sadly for me, I came up with with that insane thought: If I can see this, he must be able to see it to. After all, if he can do such insidious thing, he must be clever enough to see the insanity of it! I can help him with that, he can change. –> If you can read between the lines: I still wanted the parent I always imagined and I still desperately wanted his love.

    So, even though Ive seen through all of it early, I kept myself in the misery for another 11 years! I did everything I could to help him, I did stuff to impress him so that I would gain influence and finally be able to tell him and he would listen! I did everything I could which made me more and more miserable until I hit rock bottom and broke down. 

    So, all of this made me come to the same point all of us have come to. We have to dismiss our parent and start living our lifes and care for ourselves. I should have given up a lot earlier. Because I am really miserable now, my whole life is in change because everything I did emerged around my Dads needs. So I am also there, I don't know who I am…and Ive been there for 2 years now. But step by step…
    I really only have one issue with this topic: To accept that I can't help him and that I have to let it all go. If there's going to be a change, it will be nothing but his decision. That's the toughest one for me. I can bear all the wasted years and wrong turns…because I learned a lot about what and how I don't want to be…but admitting utter defeat is a totally different story. Let's hope Ill be there soon, because I suspect thats it's only when I really let that sink in that I can finally move on.

    However, thank you a lot for sharing this video and the knowledge. It really helps a lot to know that there are more people out there that went through this.

  13. I live in Canada.  I have been divorced from my husband for 2 years.  We have 50/50 joint custody.  I am so worried about my 6 year old daughter being with her narcissistic father.  He has been hospitalized from abandonment and depression about 20 years ago.  And 12 years ago he was diagnosed with PTSD.  He has not been diagnosed with a personality disorder at present.  I am seeking counselling with a MSW for both my daughter and I on how to cope.  Do you have any other advice you could offer me to help with my situation.  I'm slowly getting over the abuse I had to put up but I am so worried about my daughter.  Please help…

  14. Wow ur perspective is amazing every video decribes each situation to a t about the father of my child of whom im in a crazy dragged out custody battle started by him cuz I got a restraining order its been so exhausting he was all forms of abusive and continues to try manipulating every situation however the courts the guardian ad liten and even his family is beginning to c his true motive n true self he is his own worst enemy but anyway ur videos have been so enlightening and have given me the ability to continue healing and also guidance in how to deal with this entity 

  15. This exactly describes my narcissistic dad and stepmother. My Dad wanted to merge his life with mine and create me into his clone, and he used all those mechanisms. He used to call both us the "Taylormen" to help him attain N.S., with errands, and to help avenge his scores. I was denied myself in every respect and forced to be the artificial tool that was Jerry Taylor 2.0. He'd even call me Mr. T, cuz he feels it's important to be manly (meaning toxically aggressive).

    My stepmother was the destroyer type. She saw me as competition to Dad and his money. One week or month into the marriaGe, she says that Ryan (her son) was better than me and a giver, not a taker like me. The giver is the completely subservient child, whereas the other was someone who is capable of speaking up for and taking care of himself.

    The worst thing they did was to diagnose me, like a school psychiatrist did, with Asperger's Syndrome and have me put on medication. Normal parents would use this and the therapy sessions I went to help me objectively, but they used the sessions as an extension to create me into a more complying piece of secondary narcissistic supply.

    It's a shame that American society and its shear selfishness is generating people like narcissists, border lines, and anybody else as toxic as this. People need to understand there is no "u" in parenting. These people were raised with bad messages and are now monsters. Even God wants you to stay away from these people (2 Tim 3:1-7).

    Sam, your videos have helped a lot in my therapy. I have been recovering for two years from these perpetual babies (no offense to NPD itself), and I am finally becoming the individual that God wanted me to grow into. I hope you are getting better from your NPD. At least you are able to introspect, unlike my baby Dad and stepmom.

  16. I remember when my narcissistic ex-boyfriend called his own daughter a fat bit*#$. He is so full of hatred for women – complete misogynist. I experienced repeated verbal abuse and the twisted games that narcissists play. She told me he was an a**hole. If only I'd listened. What kind of role model is this for my son?

  17. Interesting. I know a narcissistic woman with a young boy.

  18. My ex N has an N mother who is the only person in his family who maintains a relationship with him. Have they developed a 'shared psychosis' to overlook all his abusive acts because even with mounting and stark evidence she still defends him? He has a golden child who he and his mother single out for favourable treatment. Is the GC most likely to develop NPD? For those children of the N who don't develop a 'shared psychosis' through their own development of narcissistic traits are they likely to eventually be abandoned by the N altogether or end up needing to cut all contact themselves? 

  19. Listen UP America, If you produce children by two or three different 'others', YOU are the PROBLEM, not your significant others and not your children… YOU ARE THE PROBLEM.  

  20. I read the comments here and am shocked at how many of these commentators have produced children by different so called 'significant others' when the FACT is they choose the WRONG 'partners' to produce children with and/or THEY have 'issues' they 'worked' to resolve and their children will and DO Suffer the consequences. 

  21. Whilst the government CAN regulate Professional and Tradesmen's work performed for PUBLIC consumerism, should and could Government 'regulate' MORALITY to dictate who can produce and keep their children?   Should government agents decide that what is in the best interests of the child vs the parents?  This IS a 'hot' topic today as Government and its Politics continues to GROW ever more interfering with the day to day lives of its citizenship and its Prisons continue to be FILLED by 'non violent' offenders who violate ever increasing laws, CODES, statutes, rules/procedures IMPOSED by Government and its Politics.  I grew up in the 50's and 60's and I am SHOCKED to see how our Government and its Politics has GROWN to BE the BEAST of BURDEN that it IS today.

  22. This is why I worry for my son

  23. WOW!!! someone who understands. So her is my question. I have an ex-wife who has finally signed divorce papers after 3yrs. I at one time tried to make the marriage work, but was told by her, and I quote," I don't like sharing your attention with our daughter. I need a lot of attention." She has a very violate history and I have documentation expanding 8yrs of her run in with law enforcement. But the legal system and lawyers tells me, as long as she dosent endanger the child there is nothing they can do. I have had her have a mental examination. It found that she becomes violate when stressed, she has abandonment issues, and she is extremely narcissist. I don't know what more to do to fight for my daughter. This women treats my daughter as if she was an accessory, and is trying to live out her ambitions through my daughter. ANY ADVICE???.

  24. How do you bring the light to court????? I can't just call him out and I can't seem to get anyone to mentally evaluate him! 

  25. The idea of this video is that there should personality standards a parent should pass.

  26. Please email me or help me with this. I thought I was out of the hell hole and now I am realizing I have another one to deal with. age 12

  27. Sam what if the mother left the NS and Now the mother now recognizes that the child is now abusive to there younger sibling and is now Gaslighting the mother.

  28. How do you get the courts to see through the narc's acting the victim and see them as the damaging parent that they are? The courts don't care about the truth, and no matter what seem to side with the mother, regardless of the facts presented, even when the proof is overwhelming. How do you turn their disorder around on them?

  29. My 16 year old son went to live with his dad. I have his brothers that live with me full time. I'm worried that my ex is going to abuse my son the way he abused me. How can I get the courts to see what I see and to keep my children safe along with my children's half siblings?

  30. Ya its really difficult with Narcissists. Because they have all the intelligence, it's proven in their clever tactics. you know they are capable of seeing the light, what is actually going on, but they choose not to. They lead you on then bam go the other way. And the saddest part is you can see them hurting, you can see them suffering! They are like little children. And they aren't happy. And they are delusioned.

  31. To bluzgirl Im the same way no matter what u cant win when they dont need u no more ur done

  32. I have helped many people with problems and issues and when I have tried to help and narcissist, I seem to go no where. I waste years of time trying to get through to them. I always hate to give up, that must be my co dependancy.

  33. My ex narcissist after I finally left him, found a younger woman with children. He was sexually abusive of me and I believe he will abuse them too. I contacted her and she blocked me and sent me a warning letter of suing for slander if I say anything more about him or her. Wow, this teaching is so spot on.

  34. Man, reading these comments is just so oddly comforting. there are people out there who have suffered as I have! I am not crazy! I am not being a baby! I'm, understood. Finally. Wow.

  35. Its so sad to hear about this and know that this is my mom. I dont know how to deal with it or accept it. Im so used to hoping she will give me what I need and want. But i should give up already, or see her in a new light, the correct light. But it hurts. It really hurts to bring her so low in my mind and feel so alone. Like I just lost something really important, but it was only an illusion I created, what I wanted to see! I hate this! And I can never make her change. I still don't know that.

  36. Thank you for making these videos.

  37. I am divorcing a man with NPD, and we have a toddler. I have primary placement now, but he is suing to reverse it. I think he wants to collect maximum child support payments. I also see signs of the "shared psychosis" mechanism. Even though our child is pre-verbal, he talks about their mutual admiration society of two and how I am destroying their perfect family. The court bias is toward 50/50 placement. We are headed to court-ordered mediation. Any advice for minimizing the harm he can do?

  38. Every time you said "child" I said to myself "wife " it still worked and perfectly described my "relationship " with my husband . He has no relationship with his own children at all from hid first marriage and a fractured / dis functional one with our children. No big surprise there : )

  39. Try to just be normal/happy. Pray. When they are 18 they may need to learn how to be ok. Maybe eventually he will not want them there…not narcissistic supply. Best wishes.

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