I am frequently asked the question, “can a person be a codependent and narcissist at the same time.” Codependents ask this question because of their distorted …
source
A Codependent CANNOT Be A Narcissist. Narcissist Will Try to Brainwash & Gaslight You. Expert
Sooooo, I just had my mind blown… and put at ease all at the same time… Ive been worrying for ages if I am a narcissist and have literally been avoiding all relationships both romantic and platonic because I thought I must be somehow very destructive without knowing how or why. It's been almost 5 years now….
19 gaslighting narcissists have watched this video.
I have to disagree bc I know people I deal with who are definitely both narcissistic & codependent. Seemingly bc of the effects of different periods of their childhood, different treatment from each of their parents or other caregivers.
Moving out of the narc in my life's place tomorrow. Announced it to her 2 days ago. Getting the silent treatment big time, meaning that blame is being thrown at me for getting out of her life. All of these tutorials have been so helpful to me these last 6 months. I often think of that Beatles song with the line, 'nothing is real, and nothing to get hung about'. With each and every passing day I got to understand that when dealing with the narc, 'nothing is real, and therefore there is nothing to get hung about'. She is already lining up her next victim. I wish him well and if I ever met him, I would shake his hands. Now it's time to move on to something that is real. At least I know what to look out for now.
8:52 – 13:00 The Narcissists makes the target turn against (doubt)himself/herself. Criticizing the target/victim incessantly to make them feel bad/wrong. That is the shortest synopsis of the manipulative Narcissist.
7:28
I refuse to get involved with people who love to hurt others, when they hurt others they'll hurt you as well. I don't want to be a part of that vicious cycle.
Hey Ross, who's playing the piano @07:25 when you show the descriptions for the passive and the active codependent? Where's that taken from? I'd love to hear the rest.
Here is another example, Manic Depressive individuals, when they are depressed they are codependent and when they are manic they are narcissists.
The question is objective and scientific, Ross thinks the question reveals some information on the person who poses it, I find that illogical. I see people who have codependent and narcissistic traits as well, the so-called "Kiss up, kick down" individuals, i.e. those who accumulate stress from abuse and who relinquish that stress by imposing it on people who in their eyes are lower in hierarchy.
A million thanks for answering, rather taking this off my chest. It's been weighing on me for a long long time. Can a person have borderline and NPD? I'm in this constant state of mental and emotional conflict of whether to help or walk away. 2nd option is something I'm working on for almost 3 years now with no positive results. Any guidance or thoughts from fellow survivors will be much appreciated. TIA.
Thank you sir, you just flipped my complete world around!! My ex-best friend for 8 years, my ex girlfriend for 5 years made exactly this thing to me at the end i was in a deep depression. Both do exact the same things as my father did. i am so shocked right now i felt so terrible for years and years!! i am so exited what to do with this revolutionary light in my head and heart!
Female Narcissism is the same as Co-dependency, isnt it?
Male Narcissism has the opposite symptoms of female Narcissism with the same root problem, the lack of self-esteem.
from 1:00 to 2:00 was sad, funny, and true! From 2:00–4:30 was intense!
A narcissist CAN be a codependant…they're called BORDERLINES!!
Son of a bitch narcissist. Thats the clinical term.
This video cleared some things up for me.
How the hell do you love whats bad about you? It doesn't seem to make sense because its bad. I understand if you did it would feel good but it seems irrational to love the bad parts of you!?
wow this guy is good
Thank you so much for this video. My daughter has accused me of being a narcissistic mother when I was bringing her up. I feel terrible about the way I brought her up. I didn't acknowledge her feelings because I was depressed for most of the time. Great video
My ex told me i was needy. I had to deny any needs I had. But somewhere inside i knew that he was actually the needy one.
Your right Ross! The gas lighting from the narcissist is the hallmark that can only work and show a codependent from the narc by using our emotions against us! Because they don't have any of any value! And it's the control game, of one that controls, and one that wants to be controlled! And there is more, but I'm healing from my issues the best I can, and at the pace I can handle, keep up the good wotk
Don't know if I agree with every aspect you describe but some very well put descriptions and traits that will definitely help some people on the road of self discovery. My understanding so far is that NPD is a condition nurtured so wouldn't the passive active co-dependent be a primitive narcissist.
what if we or they all us everyone and anyone studied all the mental health conditions and issues health status diagnosis in neurological qeeg done for all possibilities of neuromentelly conditions?
Ross, not sure this makes sense. In the example you gave you asked the woman to answer a checklist of questions. A true narcissist would also project and say that their partner is manipulative, self centered etc. Its a battle a co-dependant can't win. I've been looking into this for years because I've been devastated by a BPD relationship followed by NPD and have been trying to figure out what the heck is wrong with me to fall for such crazy making. The closest I found was co-dependant. Long story short, I couldn't win any kind of sympathy/compassion/understanding to validate my feelings and I was labeled as manipulative and abusive. I just couldn't find a decent way out with dignity and not having my name dragged in the mud.
I would even say that this woman you asked questions was manipulating you and pretending to be the victim by projecting her qualities on to her partner. The question is, how do you know she wasn't projecting?
Thanks, Ross.
Thank you so much Ross. This makes a lot of sense to me.
Do co dependents spank the monkey often?
Thank you, your video was very helpful to me at this point in my life.
Yep my ex accused me of gaslighting him when I was telling him I didn't care about him.
I disagree. Arent narcissists codependant on narcissistic supply? My narc hubby seems to be the poster child for codependancy as well. On a way worse level than myself. He has to have some form of drug or alcohol. Ofcourse certain drugs enhances his narcissism and sex addiction to the point it really seems OCD… Uhhhggg!!!
yeah they always try to "flip the script"
for what its worth.. i think the narcs behavior can sometimes "rub off" on the co-dependent…before the co dependent discovers the truth about the narc…a co dependent might say "whats that all about?" "maybe ill try it on for size" referring to the behavior pattern of the narc
Wow. Thank you.
This is injurious, there is no such a thing as a codependant narcisisst there is only narcissist ass*** who take advantadge of unaware generous people. Narcissists are sadists manipulative monsters and victims are victims. STOP blaming victims.