In this video, I’ll explain how narcissists tend to fool themselves into believing their own lies and how this can cause extreme discomfort, drama and upset for the …
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Narcissistic Distortion: Inside the Twisted, Toxic Mind of a Narcissist
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He left 5 1/2 years ago, he's still using court and my kids against me. I have my daughter but because of a lie at the end of time in court he got temp custody of my son. The lawyer that was helping me died a couple of months later. He doesn't pay child support so the the kids can feel spoiled over there. It's been almost 3 years. My son begs me to get him back. My daughter has become a flying monkey. I feel like I have a giant bolder on my chest♥
Just found you on You Tube, and so glad I did. I'm now 80 years old, and my narc, my husband replaced me in 1969. Now I know he did me a favor, but at the time I was embarrassed and felt rejected. I had to raise 7 children by myself with no family members nearby. I knew he was an alcoholic, & I went to Al-Anon. I had a lot of growing to do, and I did well. I have had no contact for 40 plus years, and I love my life. I did not remarry. I knew something was wrong with him, and I got the answer the last Monday in July, 2015 when I came across narcissism on You Tube. It was a spiritual awakening. I keep going on You Tube to remind myself that my mental health was in jeopardy because I lived with a mentally defective person
Wow, thank you so much for this video. My life was turned upside down by my exgf who did all of these things. Tonight she decided to not let me pick up our 3 year old for my court-ordered Father's Day weekend visitation. She routinely violates the protective order against her by breaking into my house, beating the crap out of me, writing on with permanent marker, and she even raped me once. The police don't do anything about it. Yet, when I went to pick our son up for visitation, she told the police that I was violating a protective order. 17 days in jail before the judge realized what was going on and let me out. There is a silver lining to all of this: I'm alive. Her last boyfriend drank himself to death.
Just split with someone who I believe was a Narcissist. I'd heard the term before but was totally ignorant of what one truly was. Thankfully, my instincts kicked in at some point and I never completely gave all of my heart to them and I started to shut down after about 5 months living with her. I made a huge mistake if lashing out at her when I left because I didn't truly understand the mind of a Narcissist. It didn't take me long to realize that it was a form of abuse. When I truly realized what had just happened, I was shocked that I could have gotten sacked into her craziness. I still care for her and even suggested she get help and this was even before I realized the narcissistic part of it. My question is this: is there a good part to having gone through something like this? I will say I'm disappointed and sad because I got incredibly close to her children and now I'm not comfortable visiting them (and this is at their fathers!) I honestly haven't cried about the loss of her but it's been a very sad situation that I regret completely. I sacrificed everything I possibly could but again my instincts kicked in at some point and I started to pull back ever so slightly. She must have recognized this and started to look for new supply. She had communicating with a new guy for a few weeks and I knew something was up. A week after I left, I merged her cloud content to my phone (since her phone was on my account) and had all of the proof of her lies and the timeline of things. I'm sure she was doing some damage control and smearing my name all over my former and her current workplace. In retrospect, I very much regret calling her out on things because I didn't realize that she doesn't think like a normal person and it really got me nowhere. Trying to educate myself I never go through this again
What if you actually have a talent? Couldn't that cause people to mistake you for a narcissist if you have a genuine talent?
There is nothing to add as you have said it all, in a single nutshell.
i am so numb now, that when i watch a movie, i feel like i can't feel the movie like i used too, get involved into the movie, because to me, now, its just all to hard to experience emotions; be it good or bad ones. I find the good ones get erased to quickly by the bad one – that i just can't be bothered having them….and i just want to keep my distance away from him because he always manages to ruin any good feelings or vibes i have regarding life or about him…..
* But it would be wonderful if you could answer me one question;- why it when WHEN-EVER I have a good day at work, and before i even enter the house, he somehow KNOWS I had a good day and he manages to ruin that day with some petty argument or manages to have or start a petty argument regarding the kids and makes me responsible when i wasn't even there to do something about it…or if WE (or just I) manage to have a couple of good days in row, he manages to ruin them for me, where i retrieve back to hating him and thinking bad about him. Why can't he help ME maintain a good vibe about him…… he always manages to ruin it for me…and why?
Doesn't he want me to see him in a good light and have good loving feelings about him???
My sister is a narc too. Living together with her trying to help take care of my ageing mother is wearing me down. Straight out of the frying pan, divorce from narcissist husband, now into the fire with the narc sis and my mother covers for her which makes it so much worse. I'm growing to resent my mother. Here I am taking care of her…well, I should just stop right here because I could write a BOOK! I know u guys understand.
I was married to one. He lied about everything. So if you are right in your belief that they believe everything they say is truth, then these types are just plain crazy.
I have recorded several video's of agruements between my ex narc , played it back ,and they twisted & distorted the remarks back to me …..it was hillarious …I laughted , because I immediately replayed the 20 minute rant back to her ….she got even more engraged …..
My ex was bad and my mother was worse. By the time they were done with me my goose was cooked.
My ex-wife used to go to restaurants and say she was the party that they called if the party who's name they called didn't claim their table quick enough. The ticket thing made me think of that.
This was real helpful. I was involved with a NPD over the last 2 years, and even though I wanted to leave the relationship months before and take all my belongings out of her house, I decided to stay until we had the face to face break up, officially". Because I didn't want to take the cowards way out an flee. She had been giving me the silent treatment for months and we both knew it was over. I'm glad I toughed it out. Because without any training in the field, I did begin my research, after the break up, by exploring Passive Aggressive behaviour. Which further lead to learning about the NPD. Then I found a ton of info/videos loaded with info about this disorder. And I came to realize that I had been npd/abused my Narcs at other times in my life. I'm so grateful for the support I've found through youtube and the internet. Thanks
may be they pick their smartest child as SG the most idealist who could possibly discover their delusion is a lie
yeap been in this toxic relationship for 21 years and 2 kids. together out of necessity
4 real estate companies, 5 financial institutions, 200 lawyers, 28 police officers – LinkedIn data breach crashed my profile waiting to hear back from them as to who actually did this horrific criminal act… @barbara_boychuk Canada immigrated 3rd worlders who have an abuse culture perhaps – I do not know these people – QC sent me to External banking ombudsman, courts, and lawyers pretending to be judges and crown prosecutors – can you imagine that in a courthouse? Calgary AB. These lawyers breached the rules of court which keep things in order..
Essentially owners were left on their own to deal with the narcissistic behavior of their bad hire or it is more like they were part of it…evidence of that exists. Bad neighbours and bad companies.
Groundless Caveat and Fake Plaintiff, theft of funds from bank accounts, identity theft, wrongful removal from property, damage to personal stuff. Home owner of 16 years in Calgary – property management company Albert Thomas Connelly did this. I wasn't on the condo board and never met him but the condo board fired them and the new company did not deal with their mess – instead they had me hire lawyers and take this to the court. I have no desire to deal with these bad companies who engage in real estate fraud and the politicians that are successfully evaluated remotely by experts regarding their taking advantage of and their harmful behavior against citizens. @barbara_boychuk – horrible experience.
A continuous, exhaustive, emotional battle – only 2 people (one family member and one dear friend) have actually witnessed the ugly truth. He's managed to successfully brainwash all family and friends, including my daughter…the ultimate betrayal.
the most frustrating thing to me is that other people dont see how evil my father can be at times. because he comes over to other people as charming and smart. people that dont know NPD will never understand how he really is and this actually frustrates me more than my father himself, because i dont have contact with him anymore.
So disturbingly accurate….Thank you.
Thus, in a nutshell: they are NOT lying, because they believe in what they are saying.
Here is an interaction I recall w/my narc husband. Me: Oh what a beautiful warm day it is! Him: It's not warm it's a bit chill ME: Well yes but it's early it will warm up Him: You just said it's warm NOW Me: Well compared to how it's been yes it's warm Him: You don't even know what you feel……..and on and on…..that was before I knew what he was up to, I kept thinking we had some sort of disconnect that I needed to be more precise when I spoke, more clear. Here's a good one. In front of friends while I was walking with a cane from a ruptured disc (from doing all the work HE should've done around the house for 30 years) "Oh baby that's really sexy, I really want you now" I was dumbfounded. A few years later I got some books with titles like 'Why Does He Do That?" They called them sociopaths back then. I'd read about narcs too, my mom is one, a horrible one. But the husband is a sociopath- I've been in this since 1974, financially (of course) I've no way out….I've had at least two nervous breakdowns, all the CPTSD symptoms. Recently I got some revenge….I fell in love with my pen pal on YT……too bad he lives in the UK (makes for a great voice tho) He's my best friend the past 2 and a half years- Oh here's one I love…."Yeah Yeah Yeah" in response to ANYTHING I might say- what a jerk-
twisted mind…. yeah that's a very succinct way of putting it. it's never their fault. In a way they're right. They only get away with their crap because there are plenty of people out there who DON'T have any core self esteem who put up with Narcspeak. Tge worst thing is stay sms whine about how awful they are. The real question is Why do other people tolerate intolerable abuse?
This video pretty much explains 30 years of my life!
I'm sure you know: there are narc women too.
Mine is a long story…
Why are all your pronouns regarding a narc, male? Plenty of females out there that fit this description.
You speak of mindfulness but are you mindful of how you overwhelmingly say "he" in your description of the Narcissus?
!! so good to see an amalgamation of symptoms for both parties..and the devastation it can cause.. so many narcissists out there! much of what this video has to say is totally taboo to some people and uploads like this one show the true nature of the narcisstic relationship. thanks x
Very well put, thank you! I just got out of my last Narc. relationship of 3 years. It's so true that they flip everything onto you. I'm so glad I finally see it. I used to be the one begging his forgiveness because he lulled me into the F.O.G.
The last 4 to 5 months of my relationship were spent trying to avoid "triggering" the narc. I had to constantly remind my children to stay away from him and even taught them what his traps were. The last 2 weeks I saw a side of him (the rageaholic) that I didn't know existed because his primary persona is amiable low energy guy. We have been No Contact for almost a year and we are divorced. Such peace in the household now. Great new job and bought a house! Yay! I love No Contact.
Unbelievable, just absolutely describing my ex, only one year with him, left two weeks ago, for the 10th time, this time I'm not going back, he won't stop texting, either am I trying to explain myself, but he just get more furious with the explanations, telling me how dare I left him and how I have the nerve to talk to him like I do now over the texts, because in person I never had a voice, couldn't contradict him, ever, I moved back to my kids dad, so he is saying now he will come to kill me and my boys.
Thanks for the video. I have mother that has NPD. My dad was her enabler. He passed away several months ago. I have an older sister who is the golden child. She has taken the place of my Dad. I am the scapegoat in this twisted family dynamic. day by day by watching these videos and going to counseling I am able to cope and deal with the isolation and abuse. I see it for what it is. Thank you for your knowledge and encouragement.
Excellent video!
I have been in two different relationships with the second one just ending just over a year ago, it was about a two year relationship. I am currently on no contact with the most recent for even after the break up she was still playing her mind games. It is now six weeks since I went no contact with her. The first relationship (5 years) is the one that I almost killed myself over, had it not been for me not going to bed immediately after taking the pills I wouldn't be here right now. I also just had to go on medical leave from work due to the anxiety and depersonalization worsening from two and half years of dealing with very narcissistic customers. So accumulative, it has been about 9 1/2 years of narcissism exposure.
please, do you have any post, book, test or anything related concerning the other side of the story, like, how to "stop being a narcissist", or how to level the characteristics of a sick person? I mean, is there any chance to recover from being one? how?? thank u