Researcher, Educator, Relationship Expert, Lyme/FIbromyalgia Coach, Consultant, Author, Speaker Emily A. Cox mission is to create financial and educational …
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Narcissist’s compulsive lying – Sex Addiction, betrayal, lies, drama
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Thank you for the courage to post this. I totally relate to your situation and it has made me think and act in ways of self destruction. I may post my story at some point.
Omg that relationship sounds like the one my ex and I had. He wanted to quit and I loved him and wanted to be supportive for him and for myself. The problem was I couldn't stay sober for more than 3 months at a time. I would impulsively seek my addiction of choice. Showing up back home hours or sometime days later. And when he asked why I chose my addiction over him I didn't know why. I was kind of a split second decision. However looking back I relapsed more often when I was scared, highly stressed or traumatized. This went on for 5 years I would tell him I wouldn't do it again, and I really hoped and tried to the best of my ability to follow thru, but I could never follow thru regardless of my best intentions. We tried moving to different town to start over and avoid the new contacts I had made in the last place we lived. I would go to support group meetings with my partner. But I was always coming in and out of the rooms. I couldn't understand why the program was working for other
Sounds like me confronting my ex… i doubt she ever read any of my emails in their entirety… they aren't bad people… they have inhuman values… and strange addictions that cannot be quantified… nor stocked… I hope you broke up with her by now.
Everyone on here..please read some Eckhart Tolle.Read what he says about the human ego otherwise your OWN ego will become your stumbling block..Look carefully at his videos on ytube called "'Addicted to Suffering"' if you want true answers and wish to break the cycle which we are all addicted to at varying degrees..Peace)
Job recruiters like narcs, lie too. One said excellent pay and free meals. Never. Another said overtime pay. I worked overtime and barely got paid under-time. They covered one dollar more than half of minimum wage and paid no overtime. They owe me three weeks of that and another company owes me two.
I had an unbelievable 4 month relationship with a narc. He literally swept me off my feet.I thought he was too good to be true, he was as things got complicated with the lies and deception. Phenomenal lover he was which kept me holding on hoping things would change as the relationship got progressively worse. I initiated no contact and went cold turkey. Withdrawals to the 10th power. Sober for 2 months. GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL HAVE A SOUL as narcs will suck the very life out of you trying make sense of the senseless.
So I dumped my narcissistic ex about a year ago. Now he will be getting married and my sister's going to the wedding. At first I didn't understand her stand on all this but now it's very clear. Her husband is friend's with my ex and she always puts up with her husband's friends and his and their obnoxious ways. If anyone knows about narcissists they always get their way and try to put everyone against you for vengeance. My ex was really pissed whne I dumped him and told everyone about his controlling manipulating ways including his new gf. Well my ex invited my sister and her husband to his wedding. I'm always with my nieces and enjoy spending time with them. So my sister is going to ask me to babysit them this week while she goes to the wedding. I am hurt by what she has done to me but I'm forgiving to her as my sister. Her husband is a narcissist as well. I love being with my nieces and don't mind babysiting them but I feel like such a loser. My ex gets all he wants and I'm left home alone babysitting my nieces. He must laugh everytime he hears I'm being used as a babysitter and how I have to hear about all his good times. Can you say chump? I know that I'm better off but I can't say I don't feel low as being the good person and being dealt a shitty hand. It seems being bad pays off in the end. The other day he put his hand around my sister as saying see I put everyone against you even your sister. He gets narcissistic supply from seeing me make some sense of all his demented ways. It's as evil as it comes and he wins while I'm being used as a fool even not being in the relationship anymore. I don't know how to react to this I don't mind babysiting my nieces any other time but it seems that all this is agreeing with his ways. Like if someone asks or he asks about who are the kids with of they are with their aunt and he will laugh as he says and "I'm getting married". I was thinking I can go out with my nieces on Saturday so I can get through the day. He's a very charismatic and likebale as well as religious so people can't believe he's a habitual liar. How do I react when she tells me she's going and wants me to stay with my nieces. What should say and act. I'm really trying my best to get over it all. My relationship with my sister has been good since a year and I really do love and care about her. She's also brainwashed by her narcissistic husband. I always knew that there was something about her husband but I couldn't figure it out. So my sister just puts up with it all even when I told her not to let herself get controlled by these two morons. In a way I'm glad he's finally getting married so I can stop hearing about it. Since we talked about getting married ourselves and now I look like the loser and he looks like the winner and the best man ever. I have been doing very good as I never called him to ask him to come back. I have been living my life and focusing on myself and what I have to do in life. I'm really proud of how much I have endured and have become stronger because of it. Yet I can't say I'm not baffled by how he gets away with it all even making my sister go to his wedding. It's so ironic and evil. On what your saying about this video I almost stopped talking to my sister for her betrayal on me. I have seen that she's the codependent and her husband takes advantage of her. Yet I have forgiven her because I see that her husband and my ex have used her even to lie to his new gf on how he's not the way I described him. I love my sister very much and her husband is even jealous about our relationship. His brother and him hate each other and he's envious of my sister and I.
You are fighting a loosing battle, my friend. Compulsive liers will NEVER come clean until they're lives become so unmanageable they have no choice. By supporting her, you are denying her her bottom. I took a huge financial hit myself… one thing i had to ask myself is "is living like this worth the money i will more than likely never get back anyways." Leaving her was the best $9,000 ive ever spent. Also, i believe people are put in your life for a season and a reason. I learned so much about myself, some beautiful things. I learned how to control myself, how to prioritize my time, and i learned compasion on a whole different level.
You are sexually obsessed with a compulsive episodic sadist. Cheat on her. It's by far the best option. You can have them both. Her behaviour, from your perspective, will improve. I bet you £10.
You deserve better! Don't settle for a zero, find your lady hero. This relationship sounds like way to much work! You are a pretty and young lady, move on. Don't waste another minute on this inconsiderate person. Life is too short!!!
Just get out. Nothing will change… EVER. Start and finish your grieving process , and move on now ! I stayed for 30 years!!!! Things only got worse! Then , because if my narcissist self inability to really care about anybody but himself, he left me! You already know what you need to do. Do it quick! It will only be harder if you wait.
YOU ARE VERY AWARE OF UR G.F. AS LONG AS UR putn up with dis b.s she will not stop. Run gurl run run run and dont look back.
these people are dangerous on all levels, i would get out while you still can, these people will NEVER change!
I am in a so called "relationship" with an addict. I understand the frustration and the hurt . They will tell you anything and everything until we become victims. And part of their "issues". I apologize for rambling … He stepped out at 3:30 this morning saying he went to the store for sweets n because he had a sudden urge to do something nice for me and buy me flowers. I immediately shut him off. I'm so done with the lies… I know is difficult ;-(. We must let go!
I'm saying a prayer for you, just emailed you! 🙂
I'm sorry that you are going through all of this with your partner. It's pretty obvious you care a lot, you're venting and and you're trying to confront the problems in a calm manner. I hope things can get better.
I had a friend who was a compulsive liar. It can get so frustating and just confusing sometimes. It can eat at you personally, because you just feel like it's your fault they are ditching you.