Normal anger vs. Narcissistic Rage and fears about being a narcissist.
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No, you are not a Narcissist. Normal anger vs. Narcissistic Rage.
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I dropped a mug in the kitchen in the morning and he came running downstairs screaming and yelling that I woke him up, what I was thinking making coffee in the morning, I woke up our pets, I shouldnt leave the bed this early, I snorred so loud that night, last night I talked to my male friend on facebook and I should delete facebook because all my male friends want to fuck me, I didnt clean up after myself after taking a shower and he found one of my hairs in the sink and my towel was in the laundry and I should use it some more days, I ate all the cookies yesterday, I should have bought him some coffee milk, 8 months ago I went out with a friend and that friend is no good, I had exboyfriends and slept with them, my whole family is crazy, my taste in clothes sucks, I'm overweight, last week he wanted to go swimming and I didnt want to go with him….and so on and so on and so on…and this goes on for hours untill he started drinking alcohol or smoking weed to get his high off something else. and in all those hours I didn't say a word because I know he will talk over me. I'm so glad I left him.
I wish we could cure this… :(
Yea that toxic rage always felt like a hurricane brewing that finally hit and then consumed the household for hours and hours… then the aftermath… Jesus.
Hello and thank you for the encouragement I am on a path of self healing and acceptance one of the hardest things I have faced in my life but I am sure as it is hard that it must be the right thing to do lately I can't handle even being exposed to the suffering and negativity in this world I am radiating positive vibrations in to the universe for all man kind as I believe we are all connected and as one of us is hurt we all feel the pain in one way or another I wish you well and hope that all will find happiness as this is the only way for any of us to live this beautiful life to its peak and principal thank you again for your kind words as it has brought me one step closer to freeing myself from the trap of my mind peace to all
the people that walk around saying omg I'm crazy. I say that a lot. lol
My ex narc of almost two decades he was like this he is soooo perfect no flaws never makes mistakes; and very dangerous… Love your vlogs as they are very helpful, thank you..
I really appreciate your videos. You fill in a lot of missing pieces for me to make sense of past my interaction with a malignant narcissist. It's bizarre how someone can pretend to be sophisticated but be so incredibly naive at the same time.
hi I'm going through a separation right now and I may be a narcissist myself I did have huge blow ups in the past and honestly I feel great remorse for the things I've done my therapist keeps insisting I'm not a narcissist but when I read thing I can see things in myself that could be these issues …my ex left in February and took the kids I have had no contact what so ever I feel so alone like I lost everything that meant anything to me I want help to become a better man instead of the terrible person I have been but can find nothing as far as fixing myself all I can find is how to punish people like me which it seems like she is following to a T …Please if you know any resources I understand my decisions and actions have brought this upon me but I don't want to continue walking through this life as the terrible person I have been any information you could give me to begin fixing myself would be greatly appreciated as I am at the lowest point of my life and am ready to accept all my faults and strive to be a healthy partner and father
As someone who's recovering from CPTSD I have to say I've had off the chart rage.
It's so weird, part of me believes you, but part of my brain is telling me that I must be a narc. But my internal state has pretty much been mulched in to a seemingly unworkable mess, so I also know I'm probably not…but i am…but now…gah! At least I know I can feel empathy and truly care about others, but still, scumbag ego won't let me feel safe or good about myself
Hi Kris I definitely LOVE your videos ! to my point of view, they are the best about narcissistic abuse on Youtube because they are very clear,you put the focus on one idea you make it so easy to understand and they are very powerful in term of education and comprehension….
thank you! thank you ! thank you! you're the best !
and despite all therapies and sublimation (I am an artist: visual comedy see my website: courtcircuit.net (works on computers not tablets or phones)i am sure you'd love my work …because you will see an abused child making people laugh ..to get attention ..) i have done in my life(my all life as been a therapy ! again the abuse of a narcissist mother) your helping me a lot through your videos because listening to you again and again and your voice is reassuring my inner abused child ..(I wish you where my therapist ! maybe we could do online therapy ? through skype or the phone ?)
I have a question anyway maybe worth speaking about on youtube to help others understand themselves : I think i became gay in my teens to protect myself from narcissist girls that where trying to take control over me..(to "dance" with me as Ros Rosenberg would say ).my unconscious (and i still fell that way) always tell me something like :be careful women=danger …never have sex with a woman or you might loose control and she will destroy you ! never love a woman for the same reason stay away from women !…Then .having sex with men is good alternative to have pleasure without the dangers…I have spent all my life alone incapable of having a relationship !
my question is : do you think homosexual tendencies for a young guy maybe a symptom of ,a reaction of having been abuse by it's mother and shouldn't we teach teenagers that this could be a sign that there is something wrong with the relation with their mother…It would have been a great insight for me to know that when i was 17 ! ……because i think now I am not" gay "i am just afraid of women because of what my mother has done to me …is love only a projection ?! and i am absolutely convinced that there is no "gays" there is only "gays comportment" that mean it is not a characteristic but only an adaptation….to an abusive mother !
have a fantastic day and thanks again to make the world a better place !
how do you fix nascitic rage my wife has it just wondering what she or I can do to make our relationship, she also was diagnosed with bipolar disorder type 2
Are you sure you are not mixing psychopathy/sociopathy with narcissism here? Studies have shown that narcissists is aware that something is "wrong" and they will embrace it once they learn exactly what is wrong (and even gloat about it). Studies has also showed that overt narcissists have less self reflection than covert narcissists. One article out of a few thousand : https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/beautiful-minds/201103/do-narcissists-know-they-are-narcissists
wow im raging when i get silent treatment, i have yelled for hours, and brought up stuff that happen in the past but he never did apologized he just waited ignored me until he felt he reached some limit of validity and would end silent treatment with no acknowledgement that he did anything rotten just skipped over it. when i got alittle better about my raging(i tried so hard to numb myself and ignore hurts cuz i just didn't know if he was hurting me or if it was just me) he still pulled silent treatment and would not tell me why, that if i cared i would know. i would then belly ache about all the hurts i felt and denied. then when i got good at taking silent treatment and did not react, he started raging, keeping me up at night stomping writing on walls, breaking stuff, destroying my property–even if i left the house to keep my self from yelling at him cuz he was dishing the silent treatment. only to return to a disaster mess, or accusation of cheating and if i yelled i didn't do that i'd get hit while he said "yes you did" and "prove it". i feel bad cuz feel like its all my fault. i don't know how to keep my emotions and reactions in check. i always fail
My brother is a huge narcissist with s very emotionally abusive nature. A very stingy.
It is strange when people say everything past should be left in the past. If you stole my money three times in the past and I did not confront you, the fourth time you do it I will recall all the other times you stole it. Many things in. The past are s actually connected to things which cone from the same behavior.
If narcissist hear this they will start asking.
Both my dad and my ex went into those rages, exactly as you describe them. I have seen a lot of videos, and it's the first time I see such a concrete description. Thanks!
This one is interesting. Rage. Good topic. You explained it well.
I have asked myself over and over again if I am a narcissist. My adult son fits all the criteria of a malignant narcissist, and all the videos about narcissistic rage, hovering, smear campaigns, etc. are exactly what he has done to me, and all of our family. In fact, there are very few of us left that will talk to him. On the one hand, hearing you say that if you wonder if you are a narcissist means you aren't one is somewhat comforting. On the other hand, it is so hard not to internalize it into what could I have done different, why is he this way, is there a way I could help him, what did I do wrong … I've had to go "no contact" because he absolutely does repeat his bad behavior over and over, but beyond that it has torn our family to shreds. Pardon this long post … I just wish there was some way I could be sure I'm not an insane person or a narcissist because the idea that I may have done something to make him this way has truly tormented me no end …
Thank you for the reassurance. I have thought that myself! And thank you for all your great education on narcissistic abuse. I have learned much from you.
I would like to add a few things to this good video…For those of us who have been chronically abused by a person with narcissistic personality disorder, we sometimes exhibit the behaviors you and some others attribute to narcissists. (You are correct this does not make us a narcissist and I am not talking about the behaviors explained in your video on secondary narcissism.)
For instance, because the narcissist does so many inhumane things to us chronically, we will keep asking for apologies and only get false (if any) apologies so we never feel that resolution that the partner has truly apologized and will not exhibit the behavior again. So we keep asking for apologies because the behaviors continue from the abuser.
Another example for those of us chronically abused by a narcisisst, we have lots of anger because the abuser lies about all of it and we (again) never have that resolution, so we may struggle with anger because the abuser does not change behaviors. Once we get away from the narcissist abuser, learn what happened, learn to set boundaries with those around us, and the justified anger can begin to lessen. We can learn to gain healthy power and control over our lives from when the abuser took our power away. (That is not scientifically written, but the synopsis of what I experienced and what I hear from others. Please anyone who has been a victim before write your thoughts and clarify anything I have said here.)
Many, many, many narcissists have used our (victims) emotional responses to their "stealth" abusive behaviors to "prove" to the flying monkeys that we are the problem because in public the narcissist is so cool and composed. Whenever I hear a video that mentions these symptoms, it triggers my trauma of being falsely diagnosed a personality disorder because my anger and demanding apologies were specifically from the chronic abuse they didn't believe was happening. Now that I am away from the narcissistic abusers, all of that has decreased.
I wish I could have known of you back when I was undergoing this crap with this abusive narc 'friend'. He did everything you describe here.