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16 thoughts on “Hoovering – Ways the Narcissist Lures You Back

  1. She texted me and told me one of my good friends might be in trouble, claimed they were a "mutual friend" yet I introduced them once, it turned out to be total bullshit she was just trying to incinuate herself cinto contact with me, creepy stuff.

  2. Won't they always claim you did all these things to them? Lol

  3. i give my narc gf such a hard time that she don't even want to hoover me at all

  4. My narc and me spit up 12 years ago. The other day i got a friend request on FB off the mutual friend who initially introduced us. I didn't think much about it first, but when i clicked on their profile. There were pictures of my narc getting (just) married. My narc has had a smear/hate campaign against me for the whole time and i can't help but feel it was an attempt to rile me. Sounds paranoid, but i know what they are capable of. I just don't understand why after all this time it's coming now? They can enjoy 'wedded bliss', actually therapy for their disorder would be cheaper in the long run.

  5. Mine hoovered me back with health issues that didn't exist. Offered rewards and promises. Used her codependent friend to join the gym I was at and play her song for me by the campfire."These boots are made for walking" I couldn't see any reason why she came back other than more pain. Telling me we're working things out but not saying I love you or letting me kiss her lips. Posting things about my abuse on facebook at the same time. Asked me about my son all the time after she had thrown me out because he needed a place to live. She once said she was like an autistic and I believe it is on the same spectrum.

  6. I left my narc nine months ago of almost 18 years of being with him; in the last nine months he has played games with me and my son, he wants to come back and then he goes away and says I am insane; and then comes crying to me at my front door, anyway stupid me lets him back in again and again… I thought maybe this time it will be ok and then all of a sudden I don't hear from him and he says sorry it,s not going to work leave me alone he says… I have lost so much weight and I honestly thought I was going to have a mental breakdown; he is all I know and I can't see life without him as I feel lost… I know why I am feeling like this now as I have listened to a lot of people and I am reading a lot about this…. I know it will be a long time before I feel normal again if that's possible… I placed a DVO on him because of his abuse towards me in my home just a few weeks back…. Since then I have heard and have seen that he has moved on to his next victim…. Because he has someone else now I was going to drop the DVO but I was warned by the police not to do this… I don't see the point of the DVO because like I said he has moved on and discarded me and our son like we are garbage and I honestly don't think he will be back… Thank you for your vlogs Annie they are very helpful…

  7. I was hoovered last week by a friend of narent. How she is hurting-blahblahblah. She has been hurting my whole life, so that is nothing new. If I was the answer to her pain, it would have been gone long ago. Just saw a post on FB when she referred to someone as a "beauty" She has never referred me or anyone else I know as a beauty. Nothing but put downs. Staying NC

  8. Yep, my mom is definitely on the psychopathy end of narcissism. She uses her children for her own ends, always has, whether it's getting money from us or turning us against one another when any of us tries to go against her. Worst she did was to force me to say my dad was molesting me when he wasn't at the age of 7. And it was messed up to see her in action as my whole family was right there and yet blamed ME for it. She kept asking "Are you sure?" every time I said no. Then, she began asking as if I'd said yes "Was it this day or that day" and she mentioned February, and I'd forgotten what February was, so I repeated it as a question. She latched right onto that and started acting as if I said yes, even though I'd said no again. She gave me this terrifying look and acted as if it HAD happened despite all my cries to the contrary, and finally all I could do was say "okay". Pretty much "as you wish". Later on, when I'd try to get help after having a breakdown in school, she'd enlist my brothers to attack me and mob against me. I was scared to death. Both instances traumatized me greatly, and between these, she consistently used me, gaslighted me, and devalued me. I had to be the nice one trying to keep my family together, but I've dreamed many times that I was choking her, beating her up, and yelling in her face what she did to me. I wish she could be punished for all the horrible things she's done. I wish there was a hell she could end up in, alone with only her toxic self.

  9. Good vid! What are the 9 traits of the Narcissist? I really want to know. Thank you in advance!

  10. I love to see you smile! I hope you smile more, your smile brightens up my computer screen!

  11. I used to be a fan of Delusion Dispeller but she expressed some anti-gay sentiments. Do you counsel those who are gay or are you against them and condone their lifestyles? I had to stop watching her channel even though her info was so good. You're very placid and calming!

  12. ….the ex narc tried to hoover me just recently. i told him to not contact me anymore and it lasted for a month. he then texted me stating he was going to a place that he knows i love to go. he didn't ask me to come, he just told me he was going. in a moment of weakness, i fell for it. when i got there he tried to get me to be 'intimate" with him. normally I would have caved on this request but not this time. i told him no and why i wouldn't be doing that anymore. he, of course, wouldn't take no for and answer and persisted. finally, we went to bed for the night and the next morning we planned to leave super early to head to our destination. as we were preparing to go, he started asking me for same "favor" as night before. i refused….he persisted….i refused and told him this was really becoming irritating. he then angrily stopped the insisting, told me he was going to go on the trip by himself and that i should leave…all discussion ceased from him… typical of this narcissist. but, i learned a valuable lesson. i saw how much i progressed from co-dependent to in-dependent!! i happily left with my dignity in tact! yay!!!!!

  13. The manipulation you start describing in the middle of the video, using minions, etc. That is my sister. She used my mother of all people to do this crap to me. Talk about twisted. It's been a few years since this happened last. My mom doesn't get why I won't talk to her. I am a grown woman as is my sister. The question should be why did I put up with that crap for so long instead of why won't I talk to any of them now.

  14. My exes ex was a malignant narc. He made a case against me and threatened to take my ex to court for custody of their kids. My ex discarded me … lowe and behold, they had a far more cooperative relationship..after he was able to get me out of the picture..I was left twisting in the wind

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