My name is Heather. My husband, an active duty Army soldier of 16 years threatened my life and the lives of my 2 boys in January 2015 before he attacked me. He was arrested. He has been found at fault with the military and the Commonwealth of Virginia had sufficient evidence to find him guilty as well. He was placed in the “first offenders program” for 2 years. I was simply given a no contact order which hasn’t stopped him at all. The constant and unending harassment, stalking, slander, against my family, my friends, and myself actually worsened. He hides himself and is very calculated in pre-planning and pre-meditating every move he makes. I live in daily fear for my life and my children’s lives. I am constantly looking over my shoulder for the final moment when he decides to make his move, finally loses it, and snaps. I have sought help and assistance from every source I can think of, and I have been turned away each time because even though everyone undoubtedly knows it is him doing these things, proving it is him in court is something completely different. There is no justice in our justice system. I am going public with my story because I have tried to be strong for long enough. I think if I show strength and keep it together, then I am strong. I am strong, but I am afraid. I am scared and I live in daily fear. I keep it together and hold it in the best I can, but it has worn me down over the past 6 months. That is what these men what. They always win. They abuse physically and then emotionally and psychologically and there isn’t anything we can do to protect ourselves from it. There is no protection from the continued abuse we have to suffer from, there is no reprimand or recourse for them breaking the law, and even when it can be proved, it’s completely up to the Attorneys for the County and State as to whether or not they press charges. So I am going public. Please excuse my language. I was very highly upset and angry over this entire situation and I wasn’t planning on this turning into what it was, but once it was over, I decided to share it. It was raw and in the moment, unscripted and emotional. It’s only part of my story. I would only tell enough details of what has happened and things I have had to do to protect myself that didn’t give away too much detail. I have taken so many measures to hide myself and protect my kids, so there is a lot more to this story, but what you do hear is more than enough to let you know how much of a problem this is. So many women deal with this everyday. This nightmare is their reality. They never tell their story and they need to! I am tired of seeing their stories on the news. The 3 minute featured recap of how their murder happened. We need to speak out and protect ourselves before it’s too late and before our story is told by a news anchor on the 5 o’clock local news! So here is my story… The uncut and unedited, raw and emotional daily terror I suffer through. Please share and help anyone else you may know of who is dealing with this type of situation. Thank you all.
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Breaking the Silence on Domestic Violence: My Story
